Missing our Noah

Vacation 2010=)

2010-08-17T21:21:00.001-07:00

Family vacation to Monterey!!

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Levitating

Ninjas

2010-08-17T21:06:00.000-07:00

Me and my Nay Nay

Love his smile!

Cutie

TJ the ninja

family vacation 2010

2010-08-17T21:03:00.000-07:00

'
Shanay

Markenley

Solomon

Taylor

Living for God

2010-04-12T10:40:00.000-07:00

I have been struggling lately with whether or not I am truly living for God..truly...like I should abandon everything and move to Haiti or Russia and care for sick children..only then will I be truly living for God. Am I really doing enough? It's hard with packed days of work and home and family to do more. I feel like God has given me peace today by showing me that I can care for his people here. There are needs here even at our own church and my own neighborhood. By bringing hope into others lives, sharing God with them we can be the hands of feet of God wherever we are. By being there for others, by meeting their needs..even simple needs can be a blessing to others. I am praying that God will open my eyes to the needs of others and to give me a heart of compassion...to show me where I can help. So, for now I will not move to Haiti..or Russia..
Love to All!!

frustrated!!

2010-03-07T20:06:00.000-08:00

Once again..ugh...Maybe i wasn't cut out to be a mom. the day can be so lovely then drama explodes. I picked up the book Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline. I think I need to read it again.
The first thing in the book is a poem...

A wonderful woman who lived in a shoe
Had so many children,
And knew exactly what to do.
She held them,
She rocked them,
She tucked them in bed,
"I love you, I love you"
Is what she said.

The very first paragraph asks if you have ever punished your child and then felt guilty about it? The author says she wrote the book to help me change my behavior!

"Once you model self control for your children , they will show better self control than you could ever imagine they could achieve."

Yes, my child's attitude was horrid. Yes, he made awful choices...yes, i think at times he wants me to go crazy. Yes, he is a wonderful kid with an amazing heart, he is helpful and sweet and loving and kind. Yes, he spent years in an orphanage with no parents to teach him right from wrong. Yes, he's hurting and only God knows what's truly in his heart and what damage was done.

He deserves better than me....but God chose him for our family...so God...HELP!!

family photos

2010-03-07T00:03:00.000-08:00

Family at Christmas

2010-03-06T23:59:00.000-08:00

CRAZZZYY's !! Jess and Markenley

Love those eyes!

cousins eating!

Kirstens Gift!

Super Excited=)

2010-03-06T22:43:00.000-08:00

So, honestly, if you had been at my house last week you would have thought I won the lottery...and I sorda' did!! I entered a giveaway on one of my FAVORITE blogs Melly and Me and I won!! Check out what I won here!!
Not only did i win, i was sooo excited that Melly actually commented on my blog! WOW! If you sew, or even if you don't you should check out her blog...buy some of her stuff! I really want to make the quilt "Once upon a time"....I really want to get better at embroidery! Since I don't think i will ever learn to knit or crochet it would be great to have a 'watching the boys play baseball hobby!"
So anyway, the fabric I won will turn into a few quilts for the kids at the boys orphanage!
I am excited to get sewing!

We have all been SICK SICK SICK...but are finally on the mend! 3 weeks of no energy...not fun! I have felt better this week and have started/finished a few projects! One quilt for a special birthday, my spring colored Christmas quilt is now quilted, and new valances in the kitchen! I am in the mood to organize stuff now but i won't because it's late!! I am in the planning stages for all my summer camps at church and that is exciting too!! Yeahhh!

Much Love!
Renee

parenting and stuff=)

2010-02-20T08:08:00.000-08:00

Oh what has happened since i last posted...our ever crazy life just keeps getting crazier. But we are blessed (sometimes I have to remind myself of that multiple times a day so i don't go completely nuts!)

Daycare is HARD! The hardest job i've ever done. It is wonderful too. I am exhausted at the end of the day. I am hoping it will get better because the kiddos are getting older...but it's hard!
Some days it's more like I am running a mini hospital ward with all the runny noses..I feel like i can't ever get completely better...it's a vicious cycle. Taking sick days is hard for me, i feel so guilty because I am inconveniencing so many others. The kids are sweet though....when they aren't crying or biting...it's so cute how they interact with eachother. I have one little boy who's one and he is my little police man/daycare helper. He tells me if I've missed something, where the babies need to sit, who's crying, it's cute.

The boys are doing great. I really don't think they have any attachment issues...but that worries me too, am i missing something?
Last night we were at the fabric store and Markenley announces that people in Haiti drink pee. I think that was something he heard on tv....too much CNN.
I don't think Soly remembers Haiti...i'm sure it's inside him. He speaks so well and is a hysterical little guy!
Markenley has been doing great in school and his 'freak outs' are less. He LOVES tv, but we try not to let him watch it much. I was noticing that at times it seemed that tv and freak outs went hand in hand...not sure, so we limit tv. God obviously knew that we were the right family for Markenley since he seems to be a lot like one of his big sisters and we know how to handle behavior like that. NO tolerance for such behavior! He is such a sweet kid.

Shanay and Jess are doing great...they both have boyfriends....UGH. I like both boys...just not too into the idea of boys in general with my girls!! The girls are strong in their convictions...i trust them. We're just trying to make sure they stay on the right path. Really following God's direction. Sometimes boys can confuse us. Maybe I'll share my story of how a boy changed my life sometime. ;)

Taylor is Goldilocks in her school play but still aspires to go to Hollywood and start her career! She is a dreamer, i like that!

TJ is Alex, the lead in Velveteen rabbit! How exciting. He also is starting baseball today, as well as Markenley! (More sitting in the cold cheering on my boys!)

Sharene is turning 21 soon...21 really?? I met Todd when she was 1. She's growing up to be a beautiful woman! I'm proud of her.

Todd is doing good, working hard at church, and being the world's best husband and Daddy.

OK. that's it for the boring update posts...i'll try to post more exciting stuff from now on.

xoxo
renee

Devastation in Haiti

2010-01-17T19:37:00.000-08:00

This past week has been such a surreal week. Our world was shaken, literally. Many lives were lost..too many precious people. I can't believe it still. I think back to our trips to Haiti and the amazing people we met. We have seen firsthand the Haitian people, with so little worshiping God in such a powerful way....and now on the news you see them worshiping still when they have NOTHING! God is alive in Haiti. I see our kids standing in the kitchen complaining that 'we don't have any food to eat'. Which means we don't have anything they want at the moment. Alot of these people have NO FOOD. Can you imagine?

We don't know the fate of our children's birthparents. We are heartbroken for them. Will we ever know?

Seeing the images of these orphans is killing my heart. Lord, what are you doing?

I am praying praying praying for many of the children of friends I met in Haiti or through our adoption to get their kids home this week on Humanitarian Visa's. Lord, you are almighty, you can move these children to the waiting arms of their parents. They need to feel safe, loved and get the help to deal with this tragedy they have witnessed.

We are blessed...to bless again.

XOXO
Renee

There are so many orphans....we are blessed tremendously by our Haitian babies...would you consider being blessed too?

Fabric-a-holic

2009-10-23T22:13:00.000-07:00

I think my obsession started years ago..but it's only getting worse! I LOVE fabric! I love to dream up things I can do with it. I am really into making purses right now. I LOOOOOOOVVVEE Anna Maria Horner. She has amazing fabric and her family is adorable. Her studio is amazing!!
Melly and Me is one of my favorites!! I have made 2 of her purses recently and they are super cute! The only problem is that the only time I get to sew is in the evening...projects usually getting finished long after midnight.
I am really interested in learning how to do metal stamping so I can make cool jewlery! Just need more time...
XOXO

Emotions

2009-08-23T21:58:00.000-07:00

Baby Shanay
Taylor, Shanay, Jessica and TJ...so young...

My kids now!

Tomorrow is a huge day in our family...a day full of excitement and joy and dread and sorrow....the first day of school. Markenley starts kindergarten!! An amazing opportunity that if he stayed in Haiti he may never have been able to experience. How blessed are we, even though it seems our school system stinks right now, that we have the opportunity for our kids to attend school. He is so excited...with his new shoes and new clothes all layed out! I think he will do great, I am a little worried though that he may get overwhelmed at times and am not sure how he will act. At home he will just refuse to obey at times..usually when he is overwhelmed..or unregulated..when there has been too much out of the ordinary going on. This happens so much less frequent than in the past so I am praying that he does ok. We are fully aware that this is a trial situation and if we need to homeschool we will. He is also playing soccer again this year! I am sure he will do better this year since he now understands english!!

TJ starts 5th grade and is excited to see his wall ball, tether ball buddies. I am excited that he will get to walk his little brother to class, something he hasn't gotten to do before:) He is a great big brother. TJ is doing amazing at the piano..a true natural...we MUST get him in piano lessons this year!! He goes online and learns songs himself...he's amazing! He is also into making and editing videos..he's quite talented. His new thing is ventriliquism to go along with his comedy/magic routines.

Taylor is in 8th grade and is right on cue..freaking out about what to wear!! Even though she has a whole new wardrobe nothing seems to look right! She is beautiful and it all looks great!!

This is her last year of Jr. High!! How exciting for her. She admited schools not that bad. =) I'm praying that she has a great year!

Jessica is a Jr. this year...sheesh...where does the time go. This year she's not playing volleyball because she has a part time job at church as the intern for the Jr. High group! She is praying about being a youth pastor so this is a great opportunity for her!

Shanay is a SENIOR...HOW??? WHY??? UGH UGH UGH

I am so not ready for this...tomorrow she will be driving herself and Jessica to school...I don't even get to see them walk onto campus...they will go by themselves....EEEEKKKK

She is trying to figure out her future!! Teacher, social worker, vet...?? Where to go to college? She wants to stay here, I am truly hoping she will but praying for God's will.

She has a job as well this year as the intern in the church's children's ministry. I am so excited to see how God uses this job to grow her...she is a lot like me...more reserved ..Jess is like her Daddy..outgoing and confident. I think this will be a great opportunity for both girls. They were both chosen for the jobs because they are amazing young ladies=)

This is so hard for me emotionally...Shanay is my baby...I don't want her to grow up...then I know Jess will be right behind her..Lord, prepare my heart. I can't imagine that someday my girls will be wives and mommy's someday...my boys will be husbands and daddy's. I love my babies...I pray that they all have a great day at school tomorrow. I love you guys much more than you will ever know.

Solomon is excited for all the kids to go to school because after they leave he gets ice cream!!! He will get to do home school preschool with mommy and the daycare babies!!

At least he's not leaving me!!

2009-07-07T22:49:00.000-07:00

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2009-07-07T22:46:00.000-07:00

Eric and Todd have a tradition of tossing the kids in the pool!! =) Soly LOVED it!!

I went into the boys room recently and this is what I found!! A friend gave Soly this adorable bed...not too comfy for bigger people! Shanay is such an an amazing big sister.

We absolutely ADORE Markenley's smile!

Getting ready for Soly's 3rd birthday party!

boys first time singing in church!!

2009-06-21T22:13:00.001-07:00

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what's new??

2009-06-19T19:46:00.000-07:00

Wow, I haven't blogged in forever! Life has been very crazy! I now have 3 kiddos in my day care and it's busy busy. The kids are great but there is still a big adjustment for the whole family. I am also still working as the event coordinator at church and I have 4 camps that I am coordinating!! Yippeee...our first one is over today. We had our Sports Camp this week and it was amazing. We had 7 kids come forward to accept Christ into their hearts. So worth the exhaustion of the week!! Our head coaches come from an organization called Uncharted Waters and they are amazing. We had wonderful coaches this year. What a blessing:)

I was very greatful to Brenda, my supervisor at church who understood that I had to leave each day right after camp to meet one of my day care kids at my house. God is providing :)

My hubby is amazing too..it takes so much to balance everything and he will stay up late to make sure our camp shirts are all clean, etc.

Shanay and Jessica are leaving tomorrow on a mission trip to Oregon. They will be working with foster kids and also working on a farm. There are NO showers..for one week!! I am so proud of them. I will miss them though!!

I am too tired to write..maybe i will post some pics.
love to all,
renee

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Happy Forever Day

2009-05-13T22:22:00.000-07:00

Today it is the boys FOREVER day. The day the boys came home...they actually entered America one year ago. I remember the WAITING like it were yesterday, the ache in my heart to have them home. They were my sons but so far away...some days I wondered if they would ever really come home. Hey, but praise God, they did! Amazing..the year has gone by so darn fast. I know there are many families still waiting and my heart breaks for them. Daily we are amazed that these sweet little guys are here...we can't imagine our sons living in the orphanage...they are so full of life.
What a year!! We've all grown so much! We've worked so much on being consistent in our love and discipline and I think that has helped. The boys still have their moments...they were both sent to bed for being naughty tonight..that wasn't so much of a happy ending to forever day:( but they are 2 and 5.
I can't help but to think about their birth moms and wondering about their hearts today..it's sometimes hard to celebrate something that is so wonderful for our family and so devistating for another family.
Happy forever day my boys!! I love you sooooo much!

2009-04-21T22:18:00.000-07:00

Our Lovely neighbors let us use their pool today...it was sooo HOT!

Thank you Cain Family!

The group!

Our Beautiful Taylor

The Lord has blessed us with a daughter who love the Lord, wants to save all

the orphans in the world, wants to belong..but wants to stand out...daily challenges us.

We love her dearly. She is sensitive and strong.

TJ met Alex in one of the plays at Rainbow Theater. They are great buddies now. Alex is a good friend. The boys have lots of the same interests....illusions, making movies, etc. Here is TJ (on the right) he played Tweedle Dum in Alice in Wonderland.

Tweedle Dum and Alice (TJ and Claire). Claire is my bff's daughter. TJ and Claire have known eachother since birth. It was fun that they got to perform together.

Alice and the Mad Hatter (Claire and Taylor)

They are great friends!!!

Taylor was adorable as the Mad Hatter!

"A very merry un-birthday to you...."

Morgan played Tweedle Dee. TJ and Morgan did AWESOME!!

Cortney was a do do bird and Taylor also played a turtle and a daisy.

Think think think...

My handsome tj...he can go from acting, to baseball, to playing piano, to performing a magic trick..and he's an under cover police ninja!! He is multi-talented.

Denial

2009-04-21T22:07:00.000-07:00

My mom called me yesterday and told me that her neurologist has diagnosed her with MS. This is not the first time...but they somehow changed their diagnosis last time. I can't tell you how I am feeling...except denial. I love my Mom, she is a strong lady. She had leukemia and beat it. She is very important to me, i can't imagine my life without her. I am praying they are wrong again.
I also know God will use whatever diagnosis for good...I trust God.

the blessing and the curse..

2009-04-12T22:50:00.000-07:00

Todd and I are both so blessed to be able to work at our church that we LOVE!! We have super flexible schedules (most of the time). We work with great people, we get to serve God as our job..there are countless wonderful things about the job...holidays are the downfall..we are so busy before the holidays and usually work on the holiday (Christmas, Easter etc). We have been so busy...Todd with all of the many church services the last weeks, me planning the Easter Outreach (not to mention my first day care kid started, he is amazingly cute). This morning I realized I hadn't even planned what the boys would wear to church, the morning was so rushed. Church was great. Shanay asked if I was cooking Easter Dinner...ugh, am I a horrible Mom, I didn't plan on cooking...i was tired...really really tired. I did end up making chicken fettuccini alfredo, not very Easter Dinner like. The boys were tired so we waited until after nap to have the traditional back yard egg hunt. By the time we had the Egg hunt it was 7:15, cold outside and I was in a 'icky mad at everyone mood'. My expectations of the day did not turn out to be what the reality of the boys first Easter was.
I really need to plan better I guess!
Goodnight.

family pics

2009-04-12T22:33:00.000-07:00

Jessica :)
Taylor and Solomon

CHEESE

Cutie pie

Boys First Easter..what a blessing

Shanay:)

My kiddos on Easter..our 7:15 pm egg hunt!!

Biggest baseball fan EVER!

Alice in Wonderland

Taylor is a Daisy and the Mad Hatter

Father and Son

GO Markenley!

Cutie pie Solomon

He has the BEST smile:) We are blessed!

2009-03-21T21:40:00.001-07:00

TJ...my Major Braves player:)

Spiderman Solomon

My Boys!

Todd and Markenley's team:)

Baseball season

2009-03-21T21:13:00.000-07:00

Today was opening day for baseball! Now we have 2 boys in baseball. TJ is in Majors this year..the kids are big! It's scary for me, but he did amazing. He even scored 2 out of the 9 points!!
Markenley is playing T-ball too!! Daddy is one of his coaches. He is adorable! I missed his first game today since TJ and Markenley's games were at the same time. We are really going crazy with kids and their schedules these days. Tay and TJ are both in Alice in Wonderland at our community theater. Taylor is the Mad Hatter and a flower and TJ is Tweedle Dum.
Shanay had her first track meet last week. It was so darn cute! I saw her out in the field and she was warming up and I just started crying!! I am so proud of her. She ran the 400! She didn't win but she was fast! She is taking her drivers test on the 25th. I am so nervous about her driving.
Jess is doing team volleyball. She is also performing in the Trojan Olympics at school...it's a competition/dance thing at her school.
I feel like i can't keep up with life sometimes:)
I am starting my daycare on April 6th. I am pretty excited...it will make the days pretty routine..the 2 little boys that will be starting are sooo darn cute.
Solomon is the only one without a schedule...besides feeding him and his naps!!
Much love,
Renee

Photos:)

2009-03-01T17:02:00.001-08:00

lSoly's Mad face! How can you be unhappy while eating a donut??

Taylor..happy at Chuck E Cheese:)

Soly and Shanay

Daddy and Solomon...i love this picture!

We were visiting Daddy's old High School...Bellermine...baseball players were practicing!

Visiting Mission Santa Clara where Daddy sings at a lot of weddings!

Life without God's Love is like a donut..there's a hole in the middle of your heart!

TJ... looking tough!

2009-02-09T21:52:00.000-08:00

Soly snuggling his Nana
Silly Doe Doe Bird

Those eyes!

"I do it myself !"

Solemn Soly

Happy 13th Birthday Taylor

Joining in on the festivities of Taylors Birthday Party

What more do you need...teenie bopper magazine and painted nails!

This is what happens when you have 4 big sisters!

Hysterical ...look at Soly standing there with his hands in his pockets checking out what the girls are doing! This is the pre-tanning party to taylors 20 girl sleepover party. In CA you can attempt to tan in January!

He loves to walk the big bike up and down the sidewalk.

Happy Birthday TJ and Markenley

Markenley...so handsome

9 Months Home =)

2009-02-09T21:11:00.000-08:00

Friday will be 9 months since the boys entered the US to live with us FOREVER. What amazing experiences we have had. There have been many lows and many highs along the way.
Since I know that many people who read my blog are fellow adoptive friends...many still waiting for their kids to come home I thought I would share more about this experience.
I think back to before the boys came home and wonder why I did not get more done before they were here...caught up on scrapbooks...etc. Then I remember that I was so obsessed with all things adoption, Haiti and attachment there was little time for other stuff...plus my heart was in Haiti...motivation just was not there. I did do stuff...just not as much as I would have liked:)
I do have moments where I have to bring back those feelings of waiting and remind myself how God put the desire for these little ones to come home in my heart..moments when they are not being that cute! I think back to their old life and am so thankful to God for bringing them home. I honestly think it is a miracle…
I believe each adoption is a miracle. The trials that we went through to get them home.
We still miss our little Noah and there are times when I am holding the boys and get sad and angry that I never got to hold my other son. How he needed a mommy to hold him. I think back to our O director who said that it was better that he died before I held him...I can honestly say that I would have preferred to be holding him telling him that I love him when he went to see Jesus.

We are grateful that Markenley and Solomon are in our family. They fit perfectly. Consistency has been a big help in the process. It is a bit hard when we are around friends or family and I can only imagine they think that we are mean at times...like for instance when we are at a party and I make them ask for food...yet my older kids can eat whatever they want. Others may not realize that we are teaching them that we are the providers and take care of all their needs. Markenley will constantly say now “Mommy and Daddy take care of us.”He gets it.
Another challenge is that our house seems to constantly have lots of kids/teens over. I do not like the boys just running around with all the big kids...especially when they first came home. We have had more issues with this with Markenley. He seemed to obey less the more that he felt independent. I felt that was more like what he did at the Orphanage. I felt that keeping him close at the beginning was better for him.
I do not think that either of the boys have major attachment issues. I was worried because of all the siblings that they would struggle with this. They love their siblings but defiantly know Mommy and Daddy.
I am now trying to give Markenley a little more independence while keeping consistency with our expectations. Recently I heard Markenley crying in bed and went up there and Soly was in his bed annoying Markenley (Soly should have been in his crib)...I think Markenley knew he was supposed to stay in bed ...i realized I had to explain that he can get out of bed if he needs something! He was obeying=)
Their English is amazing. They have not spoken Creole in months….like 6 months maybe. They never talked to each other in Creole. When we talk to them in Creole now they look at us like we are silly.
Solomon has amazing language for only being 2 1/2.
Markenley..
He turned 5! I do not know if I posted about his birthday. I cannot believe he is 5. I am so proud of him. He is truly a love. With sooo many melt downs in the beginning things are getting more controllable! He really likes to make us happy. He tries to be good. He learns pretty quickly. He loves t.v.! We have to limit his time watching t.v. He will ask me in the morning to go take a shower..that is usually when he gets to watch it. He loves Dora the Explorer and Handy Mandy. Markenley is a snuggly boy and needs plenty of snuggle time. He will say many times during the day “I want to give you a hug and kiss and tell you I love you”. He is always telling me I am cute, and if I am doing the dishes or something he will say “you are doing a great job cleaning….”He is very gentle with Solomon. He always makes sure Soly has whatever he has..and vice versa! He talks about Haiti still sometimes but says he does not like it and wants to stay here forever.

Solomon is 2! He is full of boundless energy. He is a joy. He is smart and funny and snuggly and silly….he does at times just get somber. He has a yellow stuffed lion (Nana) that he will hold up to his face and soothe himself . He loves Nana! We spend lots of time snuggling too. When he first came home he would get sooo angry if you made him do something he did not want to do. He would spit and hit. Almost all of that is gone. He can still be very independent..and stubborn! He is totally into the “I do it myself “ stage. Whether it is getting dressed or buckling his car seat. He can often be found out of his crib running down the hall...into some kind of mischief!! His favorite thing to do is put on Markenley's shoes...ALL the time..the same shoes or 2 different shoes. It doesn't matter if they are on the right feet either.

I am so thankful to our faithful Father for growing our family through adoption. Although we weren't looking to grow our family we cannot imagine our lives without them. I am not naive enough to think that we may not have many issues in the future that we will have to deal with, but for now things are good.
Will we adopt again? That is a question I am asked often....well....the Lord will have to reveal that to us. I am OK!
Life is a stuggle...our lives are CRAZZZYYYY....financially it's hard.
Shanay is doing track, Jess has joined club volleyball, Tay and TJ are doing the play Alice in Wonderland, TJ and Markenley are signed up for baseball...not to mention doing all the church activities.
I recently got my Daycare license because I will be taking care of Tara's baby when she is born...and since I stay home with the boys I thought this would be a great decision. I am still working at the church..I couldn't give that job up and my supervisor thought I could handle that too....I will see how all that goes!
Anyway...that's all for now...i will post some pics!

love you all!
Renee

Sadie Hawkins Dance

2009-01-23T21:08:00.000-08:00

Shanay and Jessica went to the Sadie Hawkins Dance at their school. It was nice because they invited some of their church friends to go with them. This was their first High School Dance. My girlies are growing up! I can't believe they are a sophmore and a Jr. They are AMAZING girls and I am soooo very proud of them. I so wish I would have chaperoned this dance!! =) It is a black light dance so Jessica was so that is why they chose white t-shirts..and Jess was proud for once of her very white legs.

Jessica, Alyson, Cameron, Josh, Krista, Shanay and Hannah

CRAZZZZZYYYY GIRLIES =)

CALIFORNIA BOYS :)

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2009-01-12T21:55:00.000-08:00

Hey Friends

2009-01-12T21:04:00.000-08:00

Wow, where has the time gone?? Life has been super busy! Thanksgiving was super fun!! We went to a Christian Conference Center for a family camp. It was AMAZING. It truly is our families favorite place to be. I have never gone to family camp there before, i have gone there for Women's retreats, couples retreats and Jr. Retreats with my kids. We didn't really know what to expect. We went up on Thanksgiving...the food was amazing! Todd was leading the music at the camp during the teaching sessions. They had classes for each age group. I was nervous at first about putting the boys in the childcare. It ended up being wonderful and the boys LOVED it!! My girls made some good friends there too. 3 days of great meals (and NO cooking or cleaning!) It was a spiritually renewing weekend:)

Christmastime was a blurrrrr....I ended up working full time from the 8th -23rd at a non-profit organization The Family Giving Tree. I did it last year but wasn't sure how it would work with the boys home. Todd was in charge of the boys all week...during tech week of the Christmas musical! The boys schedule was pretty off that week!
It was hard being gone from 8-5!
We survived though:)
The Christmas eve candlelight service was a nice experience with Markenley...Solomon had to go to his class....way too noisy!! "I want to go to my Sunday School".
My really good friend Kim came to visit California with her 5 kiddos! It was great getting to spend time with her and her kids and hubby.

We also dedicated the boys to the Lord before our church congregation. It was great. we had our whole family up on stage:) As we were standing on stage Markenley asked "where's God?" Thinking he was going to see him on the stage!

Christmas was fun...ROCK BAND and Wii Fit were the super fun gifts...and the boys got spiderman scooters and helmets! They had been sharing a pink scooter and pink helmet:) My parents came and spent the day with us. It was fun hanging out with them.

After Christmas we went to Angels Camp with Todd's family. We stayed at the timeshare. We enjoyed time with his family...and got addicted to Wii bowling. :)Thanks Bruce!
We miss spending time with Todds family and they are so great...i miss them already!
We took the boys to the snow! They had a great time, until the end when they were freezing!

Then we packed up and went home, unpacked and then got ready for a new years eve party at my house! It was crazy fun. A bunch of High Schoolers, little kids and my friends...and lot's of wii bowling.

On the 10th of January Markenley turned 5!! We had a big party for him, and we also celebrated TJ's 10th birthday too. Spiderman party!! They had a big jumpy house! Knowing this was Markenley's first party...and all the struggles to get him home...it was very emotional for me!

The boys seem to be bonding quite well. They both love to snuggle. They definatly go to Todd and I for comfort. We are working very hard on teaching them the basics...obedience, being truthful, etc.

Markenley will still get overwhelmed and have meltdowns..we are working on getting him to control himself. It's hard...emotionally and physically....he is definatly getting better. Markenley still talks about Haiti quite a bit...mostly what they didn't have in Haiti...no pillows, no blankets, no socks, no toys, no cereal...nobody kissed and hugged him in Haiti. He said they had paper and made paper airplanes.
The boys are speaking only english...and are speaking VERY well! Developmentally they amaze us daily.
Solomon is learning to not scream....he is loud..he is funny, he is sweet. He loves Nana, his stuffed lion. It is a real comfort to him at bedtime...or after he wakes up. He is very coordinated and great at baseball, soccer....any sport. (he's only 2!!)
Anyway....that's it for now...
hugs,
Renee

Love Bugs:)

2008-11-26T15:54:00.000-08:00

Cutie Pies

2008-11-26T15:43:00.000-08:00

Renee's random ramblings

2008-11-20T20:07:00.001-08:00

So since i haven't blogged in a while and i think i have had too much coffee tonight...thought i would just do a general update!

Let's see....well...I have been feeling rather frustrated lately and am trying to process it all. Last week I got an email from the American Director of the orphanage the boys lived at. Solomon's birth mom is in a desperate situation and wanted us to send pics and I am sure money to help her. They are really struggling and if we think the economic situation is bad here...it is dire in Haiti. Apparently they interviewed her a while back, even sent a newsletter out with her story and a picture of her and her daughter...do you think anyone told us about it???? NOOOOO Not until I asked about her. UGH. http://forhisgloryoutreach.org/news.php If you click on this link and read the Life in Haiti that story is about her. Then I clicked on the devastating pictures link...my heart just about broke.

That same day I was feeding my sweet little boys and they were on the back deck eating rice and green beans. I looked outside and they were laughing...as they were throwing their rice in the air. They kept doing it. I did grab the video and got a little on tape to show daddy!

Here i just read all this about their family in Haiti not being able to afford dirt biscuits for each member of the family...and my own children are throwing their food on the floor. It is heartbreaking to see such devastation and not fix it. That same morning we had taken Taylor to get braces. Ok, so as parents that is what we are supposed to do, right? In AMERICA! $5000 to have straight teeth!!!! There are people who can't afford rice! Hmmmm...sorry, i really am trying to process it all. I just believe God wants us all to do our part to help others. I really wish i could do more. I looked at Kathy C's blog with the 4 year old triplets that need a home...i had to quickly look away!! I am so not ready for that....but if I let my heart go there....

The boys are doing really great. Markenley is doing much better with the melt downs...but they still happen...had one today! It is soooo draining. I had to hold him for like 20 minutes....kicking and screaming. Then he took a nap and was a doll. He just finished up soccer! He went from sitting on the field to walking on the lines to being on the ball trying with all his might! I took him to his soccer party last night and I really enjoyed one on one time with him. It was at a bounce house place. He had a ball! When they started handing out trophies he looked at me with such hopeful eyes and said "not for me Mommy?" "Yes of course you get one Honey." 6 months in the country and getting his first trophy. I was a very proud Mommy! Tonight he was watching Pocahontis with Shanay and she said there was a part where John says to Pocahontis "I don't belong here" and then Markenley said to Shanay "I want to belong" and she said "you belong here with us" and he said "i belong to Haiti"...she came and told me. I went to him and he said the same thing to me...my mommy heart broke and I had to snuggle and reassure him that he belongs to Jesus and to Daddy and Mommy and sisters and brothers.....I don't know how much he knows what BELONG means...but this was a good opportunity to cement this deeper in his little 4 year old heart. Don't we all want to belong?
Markenley is also in major planning mode for his birthday...his first ever birthday party ever!!! I really should have had a party for him when he got home. He has had to go through Todd's, Solomons, Mine, Shanay, Jessica and numerous other non family member parties since he came home. Poor little guy. Everyday he will say "can i have a truck birthday, can i have a spiderman birthday"..etc. etc.
I really want to have a play date for him with my dear friend pearls day care kids. I watch them from time to time...they are such amazing kids....they will ask about the boys when I am there. I think it would be fun for them to come over to my house and play with the boys. They are a great group of kids for the boys to be buddies with. :)

Solomon is a hysterical ball of energy and snuggles. "Snuggle Mommy" he says a 100 times a day. He likes to tattle too...if someone hurts him or scolded him and he cries he finds someone and says "Daddy do that", or "Nay Nay do that"....etc.
Todd and I will just look at each other thinking what would we do without this kid??

Tay tay is doing good...in pain because of the braces. Surviving Jr. High so far!! She is such a awesome big sis...they all are really...to the boys at least, not always to eachother!! :) Tay is in the choir for the church Christmas musical! I love hearing her sing.

TJ is super busy with Snow White rehearsals and the church Christmas musical. Not to mention piano lessons (free at school...yeah!) and saxophone lessons too. He also is sooo into magic tricks. Card tricks, coin tricks etc. Each day it is something new with him. A few weeks ago he was putting highlighter ink into the medicine dropper and thinking it was a cure for cancer (he told taylor he would sell it to her for $100)! He has his heart set on curing cancer...he was also using a cane and walking with a limp like Dr. House.

Jessibear is trying to plan her future...Youth Pastor or the Medical field...hmm,,..i will keep you posted!! She just finished volleyball...yeah! She is doing a lot of juggling in her life lately! :) Oh to be 15 again.:)

Shanay is busy with school and friends! She took Solomon to her school soccer game last night while i was with Markenley at his soccer party. She enjoyed playing big sis and showing him off to all of her friends...and getting looks from the adults who probably think he was was son.

Todd is busy with the holiday stuff at church! Directing the Christmas Musical has occupied a lot of his time. He is also doing music for the family camp at Mt. Hermon on thanksgiving and the whole weekend....which we get to attend!! We are all super excited! I love love love Mt. Hermon and to get to go with my family is such a blessing.

Ok, that's it for now...gotta go sew stuff!

Love,
Renee

Warm feet

2008-11-03T21:22:00.000-08:00

As I was putting Markenley to bed the other night he proceeded to tell me that when he was in Haiti his feet were cold. He also said he had no jammies, pillows or blankies. Markenley is often worried that when he wakes up his feet will be cold. If he isn't wearing feetie jammies and takes his socks off to go to bed he brings this up. I have started putting socks outside his door, since he wakes up earlier than Solomon he won't have to wake Soly up looking for socks.
When we were in Haiti visiting he wanted nothing to do with putting the orphanage shoes back on when we were taking him back to the O. Later after he came home he was always wanting to wear tennis shoes..even in the summer. I really think that it was a comfort to him.
I am amazed at this little thing that we can do to help him feel loved and secure.
I am asked quite often "how can you afford to adopt?" I can honestly say that it isn't easy with 2 more kids. On Sunday our Pastor talked about 1Kings 17:7 and the widow at Zarephath. She had very little flour and oil but was asked to make a cake for Elijah. She did as the Lord asked and she was blessed because of it. We have seen many blessings in our lives as well.
It has been very hard emotionally, physically and financially to add two more kids to our home. I also believe it has been amazing and eye opening. When I think of my son's warm feet all tucked into his bed...with his quilts made by his mommy, and his 5 pillows...and how loved he feels...I would do it again in a heartbeat. I am also so proud of the other kids. I know sometimes it can be frustrating as a kid to have to sacrifice time and stuff...but they LOVE their brothers soooo much. They see the value in their little lives. So many times people have told me that they have thought about adopting but didn't because of 'time, or money'. It is just heartbreaking because these little children are the innocent victims of either adult choices or circumstances of their lives. So many children are waiting for homes, i wish i could save them all..give them all feetie jammies and a family to love them. I wish i could portray to these people too how blessed they will be as well. I know it's not an easy decision. It is a lifelong commitment....but following God's plan is amazing. So, if anyone who reads this has any questions, or ever considered adoption, i would love to chat with you.

crazy pumpkin carving

2008-10-30T00:23:00.000-07:00

aren't they cute?

2008-10-30T00:17:00.000-07:00

more pics

2008-10-30T00:11:00.000-07:00

2008-10-29T23:57:00.000-07:00

photos...

2008-10-29T23:48:00.000-07:00

Missing our Noah

2008-10-29T22:40:00.000-07:00

October is such a bitter sweet month for our family. We love the new cooler weather, fall leaves, fun events...but all this reminds us of our sweet Noah. 2 years ago in October we were all filled with excitement and joy of finally getting to go meet the sweet child that God had placed in our family. The little boy that we had loved for 11 months...and lost all too soon. The little boy who made such an impact to so many. We think of Noah many times each day. When Markenley and Solomon pray during each meal and thank God for each family member, Noah is one in the 'long' list! He is not forgotten..he will never be forgotten.
Fall makes me think back to the morning where i was out to coffee with my friend Pammi and came home to hear that Noah was sick again....the helplessness that we felt. The irritation that more wasn't done to get a medical visa. Later that night when we would get the new that he was gone....
There were so many emotions...
the pain
the anger
the disbelief
the lost feeling
the comfort
the friends
the caring
the love
the 'why?' God
the tearing out of our hearts
the 'how could i have done this to my other kids'
the guilt
the realization
the impact this child had
the blessings
the fact that he will always be remember...always have a picture on a wall, a prayer said for him, a family to love him...ALWAYS.

This month I have listened nonstop to Praise You in this Storm by Casting Crown. This has been comforting to me. I truly felt this was God's gift to me. (Thank you Honey for picking this song for Sunday's service...even though you aren't singing it;)
It is such a good reminder that God is there as our comforter.
I had another experience this month...i heard this kid say "Mommy!" and i immediately thought of Noah and was reminded that someday that is what I will hear, I will get to be with him I will get to see him and hold him. I hope he runs to me and calls out "Mommy".

We are blessed that Markenley and Solomon are home. It is amazing to see God's hand in our lives, His plan. I would be much happier if His plan had included Noah running around here too.

My kids all had a difficult time on the 27th as well...TJ declared that morning that everyone had to wear pink. Noah was always wearing pink in his update pictures. Todd and TJ had the 'real men wear pink' t-shirts...Todd wore his that day.

We decided that our family needed to be together that day so we made Jess get out of volleyball early and we took the kids to the pumpkin patch. There was a sense of sadness, but we were all there to support one another.

As we look back and remember we thank God for Noah...we miss you Noah. Keep on dancing buddy. Mommy loves you. We all do.

photos:)

2008-10-11T21:14:00.000-07:00

Jessibear

2008-09-23T22:53:00.000-07:00

Where does the time go? I have been meaning to posts pics of my beautiful Jessibear in honor of her birthday! This past week has been so crazy. Last thursday we were in the ER all night because TJ had a scooter injury and split his lip open...5 stitches later he is doing good. Friday Jess hurt her knee at volleyball and ended up at the docs for hours Friday night. ( I did get to go see Joyce Meyer with my girlfriends Friday morning!)
Saturday Markenley had soccer and did great!! He has the best smile...he runs around smiling not very aggressive but part of the team! Later that day we had a bunch of friends over to visit with my 2 friends that were here from out of town!
Sunday night we went back to the ER because TJ was having issues...going to the bathroom every 10 minutes. The advise nurse thought he may have an internal injury due to his previous injury!! He ended up being fine.
Monday we had to make appts for Jess for chest pains...and Taylor for a sty in her eye. Tomorrow TJ gets his stitches out and Markenley has a follow up doctors appt.
With all this we have all had colds this past week and have felt icky!!!
Anyway, life has been one big blurrr....

Here are some special pictures of my beautiful daughter!! I love you my Jessibear!

Happy 15th Birthday Jessica

2008-09-13T22:01:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday my beautiful Jessibear. I am so proud of you. You are amazingly beautiful and smart. I love you so much and admire your strength and conviction and devotion to God. We had a great day at your volleyball tournament, and you were SOOO wonderful. I love the way you are so encouraging to your teammates.
I love you!
Happy Birthday.
love you,
Mommy

Guada-La-La

2008-09-10T23:49:00.001-07:00

The girls are blessed by many wonderful friends...Guadalupe is one of them..I love her as if she were my own! She is a great support and has a beautiful heart. :)
I love it when my kids friends come over, they don't go off to their room, or the living room, they plop down on the couch with Todd and I and hang out with us! I love you Guadalupe...you know you are welcome here ANYTIME!

more youth group

2008-09-10T23:45:00.000-07:00

Youth group!

2008-09-10T23:36:00.000-07:00

Tonight was the boys first night at youth group!! I love love love their teachers so I felt great about them going. I was working with the older kids. It usually starts at age 4 but Soly was allowed to go! They had so much fun. I had given my camera to KayAnn, one of the teachers and she took some pics for me. There is also a pic I took of TJ during the worship time. I love to watch him praise God! I am glad I get to witness such wonderful things! Usually Shanay and Jess are leaders on Wed. night too, but they haven't commited yet. Jess is super busy with volleyball and Shanay wanted to wait to see what her homework load would be like as a Jr.
It really helped me tonight to get out and be with big people!! I was blessed by my good friend Susan Newton tonight too! Thank you God for her!

Hangin out with the birthday girl

2008-09-10T23:31:00.000-07:00

Here are a few random pics from Shanay's birthday weekend. I think she has the rest of the pics...i need to find them. I love her crown..because she is one of my princesses!

First day of school pics

2008-09-10T23:25:00.000-07:00

We have to take them..every year! I can't walk them all to class the first day, but we must at least get one picture!! This year Shanay and Jess had to leave at 6:45 am because they hadn't gone to registration. I had to make sure tay and tj were up and ready for the pic before the other girls left. Yeahhh they were!!!!!...soly was still asleep though!

In a weird place...

2008-09-09T18:37:00.000-07:00

I know that God has placed me here...exactly where I am at this very moment. I have prayed to be here....in God's perfect will....living His perfect plan. I can tell you it's not always easy. It's somehow pretty lonely, yet I am rarely alone. I am unbelievably happy that the boys are home. They are an amazing addition to our family. They are great kids. We are extremely blessed. At times I feel like I am going crazy...like today...but if I hadn't obeyed God I would have missed so many blessings as well. I am thankful for the opportunity. It bugs me when people think of it as a burden. They are children who are innocent and deserve to be loved.

I do stay home sooo much more than before, spend time with my friends so much less. I don't really have many friends who truly understand anything I am going through on a daily basis....or really ask. Everyone's lives keep on going, and mine does too..but maybe in a different direction. I am in a place of greater dependence on God..to be my friend and my Father...and so thankful for Him.

Markenley's first soccer game!

2008-09-07T22:04:00.000-07:00

Written by my hubby..borrowed from his blog..

Markenely has been in the U.S. for less than 4 months. So you can understand that we would be a little apprehensive to throw him into a great social sport event such as soccer. Well we did anyway and today was his first game. The first quarter he just sat on the field near the Goal Box not moving a bit. Even with the action swirling around him, he didn't budge. We encouraged him tremendously but to no avail. The second quarter he sat on the sidelines. But by the third quarter he finally found his soccer legs and was off and running. His smile filled his face. It was a great joy seeing him have so much fun. He only kicked the ball once, but he was on the field having a blast. This is a some of the footage from the game. Enjoy.

Trying Day

2008-09-05T22:21:00.000-07:00

I am exhausted today...a lot has to do with the tons of yardwork/house maintenance stuff we are working on and the emotional stress of the kiddos.
Today was a tough day for Markenley. He seemed to be out of wack emotionally. I won't go into all the details but it is so difficult...it makes me sad...especially because I know that he doesn't want to act the way that he does. He literally cannot control his emotions. When these things happen I don't always handle it the best way. I am really trying to show love to him the way Jesus would love him. This can be very difficult with an out of control child. What I am finding works best is to just hold him and let him 'get it out' until he finally calms down and then clings to me and is very sorry. I just sit and pray and sing and comfort him...what he probably missed out on as an infant. After his rage and nap he was a darling little boy. I decided to put him on 'restriction' today...basically told him that he could not play outside in the front yard or with any friends from the neighborhood. I wasn't sure if he would 'get it' but he seemed to understand. He didn't fight it....when Solomon was out front he didn't try to go too. He was extra sweet and apologetic. I wasn't really trying to use this as a punishment as much as because I felt he needed to stay closer to Mommy and Daddy and not the other kids friends. It is hard because they love playing with Markenley and he loves them. I am praying that tomorrow will be a better day!! Tomorrow is Markenley's 1st soccer game! He has only had 3 practices..and didn't really pay attention the whole time!! He doesn't know what a 'game' is...i don't think he really knows what a 'goal' is...it should be interesting. He is really excited...so are we.

Beautiful One I Love!

2008-09-01T16:10:00.000-07:00

growing up!

2008-09-01T16:06:00.001-07:00

Happy 16th Birthday Shanay

2008-09-01T15:12:00.001-07:00

Happy Birthday my beautiful daughter. I am in tears as I write this because i don't want you to grow up. The time has truly gone too fast. You are truly one of the most amazing people I know. Your strength and determination to stick to your godly values make me so proud. The other day when someone asked you about being around someone who may not be the best influence and your immediate response of "I live above the influence" cracked me up...but it's so true. Time and time again you make such Godly choices, and I know it's not always easy. I am constantly being told by others about how sweet you are and a joy to be around you are. I love the kind of friend you are! I love the way you serve the Lord with your life. You have been a big help to me, especially with the boys. I know I am your mommy but I also consider you one of my very best friends. I am blessed to know you. As you are embarking this next stage of your life I will be there for you always. I am excited for your future and know that God has great plans for your life. As much as I always want to protect you from any kind of hurt I know those are the times that you will grow and you will learn to depend more on God. You have proven that to me!! There are so many times that I learn from you...if I am talking about something you may think is gossip, you will correct me!! I thank the Lord for you! I could go on all day listing the great things about you...but for now I will just say I LOVE YOU with my whole heart and HAPPY BIRTHDAY my Pooh Bear!
love,
Mommy

Family Update:)

2008-08-29T12:00:00.000-07:00

Hi!
I haven't posted in a bit..so I thought I would catch up on a few things...
hmmm...let's see...On Aug. 14th my wonderful hubby and my sweet -n- sassy 12 year old left on a 10 day mission trip to Arizona. They went to work at a home for mentally disabled adults during the day and at night they do a VBS program for kids on an Indian Reservation. It is a wonderful trip, I went with my other 2 daughters a couple years ago. It is long...getting up at 5 am, working outside in the heat all day..getting to bed about midnight. It is an amazing mission trip for our Jr. High kids.
I wasn't thrilled with Todd leaving so soon after the boys coming home...but the boys did fine. They were sad at times and kept kissing his picture on my phone, or would just sit there sad and saying "I'm sad, I miss Daddy and Tay Tay".
I had my older girls here to help, when they weren't busy:) I did really enjoy evenings with the other kiddos. TJ was the man of the house! The girls and I would hang out in the evenings and had lots of great girl talks. I think when Todd came home they even missed me sitting with them and hanging out, so I will keep that up, it was wonderful.
I was soooo sad too. After 16+ years of marriage Todd is so much a part of ME. I am super glad he is home!!
The day he left was a monumental day in our family as well. SHANAY got her drivers permit!!!! Jessica stayed home with the boys so I could take Shanay to go take her test...it was an exciting time, but so nerve-wracking as her Mommy...what if she didn't pass???...i was so anxious. She did great!!! I was so proud of her.
I pulled the van over when we got around the corner from our house. She had never driven the van before...she was going 10 miles per hour and was so worried about going over the line that she nearly hit all the parked cars on the road...i was freaking out!!! I so wanted to be the one to teach her to drive, since Todd was gone this was my chance...after that I wasn't so sure!!! I did take her out another time in the CAR that she was used to and she did better. Someone almost hit her though...HIS fault, not hers.
The day that Todd and Tay came home we were off to Monterey for a week to stay in our timeshare. I had to book this trip 13 months in advance because it's always booked...Jess had volleyball try-outs during the week so we had to drive her back home where she stayed with my friend for 2 nights, and then we drove back to pick her up and bring her back to Monterey. Thanks Jen Jen!!
It was great though...we could walk about 100 steps to get to the beach, 40 steps to the pool and about 15 to the playground. It was super fun. We went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium....i love it there!! The kids did too. The boys did wonderful in the new environment. It's amazing how go with the flow they are. They are both doing great in the water. Soly will just jump right in, not wanting you to catch him!!
TJ, thanks to the olympics, now wants to join the swim club!!
I posted some of the pictures!!! I love that my girls are so into taking pics...i remember forcing them to take pics before...now it's like "take a picture of me doing this..or that...or whatever"...we have a ton of pics!!
The girls are even wanting to scrapbook. While Todd was gone, Shanay had the opportunity to go out with some friends but chose to stay home and scrapbook...i love it!!
I will try to post more about the adoption-attachment soon. Some days are great...other moments aren't...The boys are learning so much, they really are doing great. Markenley recently has lied a couple times...hmmm....but he has a gentle spirit. Soly is funny too..he is super happy. He is doing great too with learning what is acceptable. He used to hit when he would get mad. Sometimes he will hit but then apologize right away.
Markenley is playing soccer and had his first practice before vacation and did so good. Paid attention, did what the coaches said...I am so proud of him.
The kids start school tomorrow. Each year is so emotional for me. I hate them getting older. Shanay will be a Jr., Jess a sophmore, Tay in 7th (JR. HIGH!!) and TJ is in 4th. UGGGHHH
Markenley will be doing home-school preschool too!! He is excited.

The journaling above was written on the 23rd...i am just getting around to finishing it 8/29...
The kids did start school and are all doing great. Jess made the volleyball team and Taylor joined cross country. (in school I would have never CHOSEN to run!! I did anything i could to get out of running the mile :) You go Tay Tay!! Please pray for Jess as volleyball is draining...last year, i am sure it was because of volleyball, is when Jess got drained and ended up with Mono which lead to a whole year of feeling yucky. We are happy she is trying again and is physically able.
TJ wants to play the trumpet and also joined the morning broadcast team. Markenley and Solomon had their 1st day of home preschool and they loved it, it was cute.
This is officially Shanay's 16th birthday weekend. I have been trying to get her to plan a party, i wanted to choose a theme etc. but she hasn't come up with what she wants to do...she does know she wants to go to the SF zoo!! She LOVES Giraffes! That's why in some of the pics she is wearing a giraffe sweatshirt:) I am so not ready for her to be 16!
Well, gotta run to the school to do my PTO duties.
love you,
Renee

Beach Trip and Stuph:)

2008-08-29T11:31:00.001-07:00

Soly couldn't wait!

2008-08-25T09:45:00.001-07:00

praying:)

2008-08-25T09:33:00.001-07:00

guitar hero praise

2008-08-05T10:53:00.000-07:00

Sibling torture

2008-07-31T23:46:00.000-07:00

Shanay and Jess were home with the boys for a little while today...when we got home they showed us this video. Solomon is afraid of this little wind up toy...call it torture, or helping him get over his fears, i am not sure...what are big sisters for?? I love how polite he is at the end. We love him so much, he is a hysterical little guy!!

TJ's Batman Video:)

2008-07-31T23:40:00.000-07:00

My son cracks me up with his wonderful acting skills!! Obviously he has seen the Dark Knight and loved it!

What a week..

2008-07-27T20:16:00.000-07:00

My Handsome son's BEFORE PIC!!

This was in the ER after the swelling went down about 75%.

Black and Blue...a few days later!

Day Camp is over...and I am exhausted!!! We had about 90 kids in the camp and each day we had a fun trip planned. Day one, shadowcliffs...a man made lake...the morning started off by being super excited that we had my favorite bus driver from years past. Being a girl, and liking to talk, somehow on our short adventures I have gotten to know her a bit over the years. I was getting caught up and asked her how her hubby was... "he died last Monday"....ugghhhh...i felt horrible. I was sorda in a funk all day..sad for her...

Tuesday...Golfland water slides...HORRIBLE DAY!!!!!

The kids were all given their safety information from the lifeguard and sent on their way to play...the lifeguard forgot to say anything about the mini golf safety rules...the one about not swinging the golfclub above your knees...I can tell you I will NEVER forget that rule...not even 5 minutes after the kids were sent off MY SON (who was one of the kids in the camp) was brought back to me...his face was HUGE, he was bleeding and crying...it looked like there was a tennis ball on his face. I was starting to freak, grabbed a baggie, quickly grabbed ice...and Brenda (our CE director who just happended to come to pay for the day) drove us directly to the ER where Todd met us...Thank you Brenda..The vision of seeing my son that way was HORRIBLE...i will never forget it...his face was HUGE. We got to the ER and they did a CT scan...thank you Jesus...it was not broken. It could have been so much worse..near his eye or teeth.

The swelling did go down a lot...but was still awful looking. Thursday was opening day of Willy Wonka Jr. which TJ has a lead role in (Mike Teavee)...His last play he was in he got a fat lip (huge fat lip) by running into a girls head. He vowed to never do theater again.

I will post pics of his pretty little face...but these pictures are nothing compared to what it looked to at first.

I love Tj's spirit though..by the end of the week he was totally fine...dancing and singing on stage...praising God..no thoughts of his black and blue face.

Wed. Great America---Good day for the most part. It's stressful because it's such a big responsibility. 14 leaders keeping track of all those kids.

Thursday...Ice skating...Little sweet Sophia fell on the ice and our Senior counselor stopped to turn around and help her and her skate hit sophia's finger and cut it pretty bad...we had to call her Mom and Pam (my co-director of the camp) took her to the doctor...she had to get stitches. I just feel awful...I hate injuries...there was a lot of blood.

By the end of that day I was so exhausted. I felt horrible...

Then Friday....

Pool day...we have lifeguards....the counselors are in the pool with the kids..pretty safe...so you would think...

I literally had just scanned the pool and all was well, I had been getting on kids and counselors for goofing around too much.

Next thing I know one of our counselors, Alyson, who is also one of my daughters best friends and spends lots of time at our house was brought out of the pool with a bloody nose. We get her ice and sat her down....it is clear at that moment that her nose is broken. I had to call her mom and figure out where to take her. It was horrible. I feel so bad for her. At this point they are planning on doing surgery on Wed. after the swelling goes down.

I have been directing Day Camp for 5 years with only one injury (a kid was on stage dancing and singing and another kid fell on him and fractured his finger). This year 3!!!

We are thankful that they weren't more serious than they were. I am emotionally exhausted from the week.

One of my high school counselors reminded me that when you are doing good things for God bad things will happen and she said this was one of the best Day Camps ever..thank you Anna Kay.

God was definatly evident in the camp and there were amazing relationships formed and lives changed for God. We raised about $800 for an orphanage/school in Haiti. I need to focus on all the good that was done in that camp. I am blessed to be able to be a part of it. Thank you God! :)

It was hard being away from the boys so much...when i was home, i was tired. Now my busy season is over...i can spend time with the boys! :) Thank you to my sweet hubby and my wonderful daughter Taylor for caring for the boys!

Ok, we did it...we cut his hair!!!

2008-07-19T20:49:00.000-07:00

WHAT DID WE DO??? We have been going back and forth about what to do with Markenley's hair. It is adorable au natual..but takes about 15 minutes every morning to comb/condition form the ringlets etc. When it's not conditioned it's super dry..when i over condition it it's extremely icky and greasy and we were all getting pimples from the products.
On the good days i say let's just keep it long...but it's been super hot and I feel for him..so recently I braided it, and like when he came home from Haiti, he was called a girl numerous times.
He also likes to wear hats, that was hard because his hair was so long and if he did take the hat off it looked funny. He also wears a helmet while riding the scooter... helmet hair...not cute. I also really wanted to get to his scalp and really see the condition of it. Solomon has a fungus on his that was treated and now he's fine. We didn't want to traumatize Markenley so we have waited. We cut Solomons hair recently and so we have been asking Markenley if he wants his cut. Some days it was yes, some days no. Recently he was asking to have it cut. We finally decided to just do it. We know it will grow back. This will give us a fresh start. This was so hard emotionally for me...but I do think he looks adorable!! When I first showed him himself in the mirror he didn't like it, didn't want to look...it was so sad. But now he is happy. Here are some pics of the new hair cut...and other pics too. :)

Lunchtime in the backyard!

Lunchtime for Soly too!

Taylors Umpa Loompa wig!

ADORABLE!

GUITAR HEROS!

Daddy is cutting my hair!! :)

LOOK AT ALL HIS HAIR!!!

HANDSOME MARKENLEY AND BEAUTIFUL SISTER SHANAY!

SOLOMON IN HIS TRUCK!

MARKENLEY LOVES TO HELP!! HERE HE'S TAKING OUT THE TRASH...
PRE-HAIR CUT!

KITTY CAT LOOKS CUTE WITH MARKENLEY'S HAIR!

SOLOMON!

I LOVE BASEBALL!!

VACUUMING HIS HAIR!

BROTHERS!

I DO LOVE HIS HAIR...I AM KINDA' MISSING IT!! :(

California's Great America

2008-07-19T01:09:00.001-07:00

We took the kiddos to Great America today. It was the boys first time. We also took Zack..my friends little boy who the boys love. :)

TJ is great with the boys...and just the right height for the rides that the rest of us are all too tall to go on! I think he secretly likes it!!

Jessica...using the hydrant!!

Zack and Markenley

TJ and Solomon!

We ran into some good friends and her daughter Steffy rode with Markenley!! How fun!!

Too SHORT!!

It's a good thing the boys are blessed with RESPONSIBLE sisters!!

Update...

2008-07-19T00:36:00.000-07:00

Hi,
Well..how is life, really??
Crazy...busy...but good....mostly.
Summer is super busy for me, which means my whole family.
We started off summer with Sports Camp, which i coordinate...then July 7-11 was VBS which I was one of the Directors. Todd did the music/teaching time and Shanay and Jess were leaders...Shanay was in charge of Markenley's group. Taylor was a helper in the preschool with Solomon. Our VBS was at night this year, due to the construction of our new building. This was great because I didn't have to drag the family to church at 6 am! The boys did pretty good...mostly....
On Wed. night (evangelism night) Markenley LOST it big time. He was doing this screaming thing..over everything! I am trying so hard to teach him to sit on time out. When he is in these moods he is just out of wack...i think it's due to the over-stimulation...i don't know for sure. I had to leave early...I felt horrible. I was in tears the whole night and just emotionally drained. Thank God for my team..they were all supportive.
On Thurs. I was just praying that he would be fine. He was GREAT. I did sorda' bribe him..he wanted a half a piece of licorice and 2 m and m's that i had and i said he could have it after VBS if he was nice to Shanay and was a good boy. That's like 3 hours to wait...and he did. Friday he did great too. I do try to keep tight reigns on him at church and I don't let him just run around and do what he wants...we are still working on boundaries.

I don't know if I have shared this or not..but as we were waiting for the boys I would often think of my love for the boys and our longing for them to be home in relation to God's love and longing for us to be with Him.
As Markenley was having a difficult time fighting me the other night and kicking and screaming and resisting my love...i thought about that...is that what I do to God?? Do I sometimes ignore what he is trying to tell me? Just as I know what Markenley should do...God knows what is best for me. I am thankful that he is always here for me..i hope Markenley will know God's love just as fully.

There are definite times where we feel like we are drowning...next week I am in charge of our Day Camp (it's an ALL day camp for 3-5 graders) and then I am pretty much done with the crazy schedule for a while and can be home all day. Hopefully that will help.

I do feel like the boys are doing good....then we will have little set backs. They are good boys.
Today we were all home and we were in and out of the house. TJ brought Markenley in and I thought he brought Solomon in too....and we were all in the house...after about 7-8 minutes I noticed we were all in the same room, except Solomon...AHHHHH
I freaked out and ran out in the front yard...there was Soly, all by himself on the scooter!!!!
Thank you God for keeping him safe. I can't imagine what he was thinking!! He was probably excited that Markenley wasn't there to take the scooter!

I do worry about attachment. I worry that I am doing the right things. There are times where Markenley will resist eye contact and closeness, other times he is all snuggly. I struggle with not taking it personal and holding back any love towards him..I constantly have to remind myself that this is new, and it will take time.

The boys are sleeping in their own room. They actually go to bed pretty easily now. Markenley is fine as long as he knows what is going on. He will ask if TJ is going to come sleep next to him "later, when he's finished". TJ does have his own bed on the top bunk, but prefers to sleep with Markenley. They went through a period of time where they would both(Markenley and Solomon) look out the window...they aren't allowed to do that!! Now Markenley will say "Markenley no touch window...Solomon touch window". Little tattler!

Markenley does learn fairly quickly. He likes to make us happy. He seems to be happy.

Solomon is a happy little guy...does have his tantrums...when he gets mad he hits, kicks, bites and spits....it doesn't take long to get him calmed down though. Those are just his orphanage survival skills kicking in.

We continue to take one day at a time..asking for God's help and healing. With 6 kids in the house life is crazy..and trying to meet everyones needs is tiring...but we are so blessed.

Hugs,
Renee

more pics

2008-07-06T23:00:00.000-07:00

4th of July Pics! Proud little Americans!

2008-07-06T22:38:00.000-07:00

I love this guy!!!

2008-07-02T23:39:00.000-07:00

I LOVE HIS SMILE!!

TEAMWORK!!

ALL STARS!!

2008-07-02T23:27:00.000-07:00

TJ made the All Star team for baseball. This is after the regular season, a group of kids are selected to compete with the best of the best. I love TJ's team spirit. He works really hard and continues to keep a wonderful LOVE of baseball..having fun all along the way..winning or losing...
I try to remind TJ that God is allowing him this opportunity and he needs to give God the glory and his attitude needs to honor the Lord at all times.
Tonight his team won!! TJ played great! I am so proud of him. His next game is Monday..which Todd and I are bummed about because we are both working our VBS, which is at night this year due to the construction at our church!! We hate missing a single game.

Uh oh ---

2008-06-29T23:11:00.000-07:00

On their way...

2008-06-27T21:48:00.001-07:00

I miss you girls!! I know you are having a blast with your friends!! I know your lives are being changed and your hearts are growing closer to God. I love you!!!

Shanay and Jessica

Shanay, her great friend Izzy, and Jessica!!

I miss them already!!

2008-06-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

My beautiful daughters are off to Mexico tomorrow with our church on a mission trip. They will be gone for 10 days and I am already sad. I am proud of them for wanting to serve God in this amazing way. I am excited for this opportunity for them to grow closer to God and their team. I look forward to see all that God has in store for them. I so wish I were going with them but I FULLY trust the team that they are going with. I also know God wants them on this trip and trust him to take care of my sweet babies.

Sisters on a mission for GOD! You go girls!

I love you sooooooo much!!!! You are my babies!!

I miss you!! SMOOCH!

pics

2008-06-26T21:36:00.000-07:00

Solomon's Birthday party!

Soly LOVES Baseball!! I had to make him a bat and ball cake!!
Of course our family needed jerseys!!

Our team!

We love you Papa!

Markenley and Shanay

Check out my Slide Show!

2008-06-17T22:06:00.001-07:00

Life...summer....doctors appts.

2008-06-12T23:18:00.000-07:00

Hi..i started this post on June 14th...I am just getting back to it!

Hi! Today was the kids last day of school. Needless to say they are very happy! Shanay and Jess are thrilled because they now have texting back on their cell phones...oh, the little joys in the life of a teenager.

I can honestly say things are going really well with the boys. They seem as if they have been here forever. Honestly, there were a few days about a week after they were home that I was overwhelmed and tired and had a bit of post-partum adoption. I thought i should be SOOO Happy...but i was depressed. I wondered what we had done...what a huge responsibility we have taken on...we CHOSE this. But in all actuality, GOD chose this. What sacrifice is too big for these little guys? TJ now seemed so big to us...i was mourning his growing up. I was sick. I was exhausted. Everytime I would look at Todd and ask him if he was worried or if he still thought it was a good idea he said he didn't doubt it one bit. That helped. Praying helped.

OBEDIENCE: We have been working so hard on teaching Markenley obedience. He is really getting it. The first few weeks when he would 'throw a fit' or not come when i told him to and i tried to get him to do something i asked I would just hold him. He would CRY and tense his body. I would hold him like a baby and just pray for him (this was not easy...he is pretty strong..by the end of the day my arms and hands would hurt. At first this was about 20 minutes or so. Then he would relax his whole body, and instead of yelling Daddy, or whatever he was saying in Creole...he would start saying Mommy. He would hold me and love me. Then I could talk to him and he would listen and obey. We would celebrate! :) I feel like i am being pretty tough on him expecting immediate obedience...but when we aren't going through that we are having so much fun and giving him LOTS of love!! Now if he has those times they are much quicker.

Solomon's discipline: Solomon is doing pretty good...a little love bug. His biggest issue is when he gets mad he will hit and spit. This breaks my heart. I feel that is his orphange survival skill. This is when i pull him close, pray for him and put my finger on his lips and then give him lots of smooches on his lips to show him what his lips are for!

BEDTIME: This was horrible for a while. We started off laying with them until they were asleep. This was fine until Solomon took hours. At first he wouldn't go in his crib. He would ball his head off and hold out his arms for me. One day when Todd and Taylor were putting the boys down Taylor layed him in his crib and he went right to sleep. HMMMM obviously he could do it. For the next few nights i had todd put him to bed. So, we transitioned to laying with Markenley while Solomon was in his crib. Then we decided to try to leave the room before they fell asleep. Markenley was fine if we reassured him that we would be in the other room and we would be there when they woke up. Solomon likes to stand up and give lots of kisses. Well now we do their routine, bath, jammies, massage, storytime, prayers...give more snuggles, reassure them...tuck them in and then leave the room. The last couple nights Markenley would tell me "Night night Mommy, I love you so much". It was so adorable. Life is easier now that naptime/bedtime isn't taking hours. I need this time with my other kiddos.

DOCTORS APPT: They had their physicals. Their bloodwork came back good...except...They are both enemic...they need to be put on extra iron 3 times a day for 6 months.

Their lead levels are HIGH. Markenley's was 6.7 and i guess 10 used to be ok but now the level that is good is 0-2. They aren't going to do the treatment because the side effects aren't good.

I guess high lead levels can cause your IQ to be lower than it would normally, possibly problems concentrating, etc.
Markenley also has Giardia, and his TB test came back positive..but the chest x-ray came back negative so he doesn't have TB but was obviously exposed to it. He has to take a pill everyday at the same time, on an empty stomach, for 9 months!
The boys had their first dentist appts. and they were perfect for the dentist. Markenley has 4 cavities and Soly has none.

June 26th now...
We celebrated Solomon's 2nd birthday on the 22nd at 2:22 (get it??? 2's!!) We had tons of people and it was fun. Tomorrow is his actual birthday!

I will update you more later...
love,
renee

Check out my Slide Show!

2008-06-04T23:35:00.001-07:00

Daddy come right back?

2008-06-04T23:07:00.000-07:00

I can hardly believe that the boys have been home for 3 weeks. Wow, time flies now!! We are really enjoying having our family together. We continue to grow together daily and are trying to get a bit of a routine.
Markenley is a sweet heart and is such a helper. If we are bringing in groceries he will go out and help. When there is dirty laundry on the floor he will pick it up and put it in the laundry basket. He is doing well with his siblings as well. We seem to be growing daily in our 'attachment'. We are also making time to spend with our other children as well. They are super great helpers.
Markenley seems to learn quickly. When he does have a meltdown I will just hold him and let him cry and scream. There were times that would be 20 minutes long. Now he will calm down much quicker and then say sorry, or whatever i tell him to say, i will offer words of love and then explain to him what needs to be done...holding my hand in the store, or whatever it may be.
He seems to get the phrase "Daddy come right back!" and that makes him content to let Todd leave. When Todd is gone he will say this from time to time as to re-assure himself.
Solomon is hysterical. He is a little minicker. Today Markenley was doing somersaults on my bed..he would say "1, 2, 3 and then do the somersault." Immediatly after Solomon would say "1, 2. 3 " and then throw himself down face first..as if he was doing a somersault.
The boys discovered barbies yesterday and have been having fun doing their hair!
I appreciate all the well wishes and wonderful comments!
love to you all,
Renee

Family Picture

2008-05-28T21:59:00.000-07:00

Mommy, Markenley, Taylor, Todd, TJ, Jessica, Solomon, Sharene & Shanay

ice cream at the ball game

2008-05-21T23:03:00.000-07:00

Markenley didn't eat his spiderman ice cream, he put it back in he wrapper to save for later. How could i explain that it would melt in the 100 degree weather. Poor guy!

He wanted to taste sisters ice cream!!

2008-05-21T23:01:00.000-07:00

Shanay and Markenley

PB and J

Patience, pee pee, and sleeping

2008-05-21T22:02:00.000-07:00

Through the whole adoption process I felt the Lord teaching me trust and patience. I feel that now even though the boys are home that still seems to be what i daily pray for. As a Mommy waiting for her kids and praying for them as they are being cared for in an orphanage my heart ached for them. Now that they are home my heart aches for their hearts to be healed. Praying that daily we are doing what is right for them to help with attachment, for them to be secure. As I write this Solomon is playing very sweetly with Jessica and laughing and kissing her...how sweet he is.

On Monday we were at Todd's softball game and Markenley had to go pee pee...there was no bathroom...I figured we would run to the nearest tree...that's what all the boys on TJ's team do. I didn't know how i was going to communicate this to him with my limited Creole. Just then Zach who is a little younger than Markenley heard that we were going to pee and he had to go too! GREAT!!! I had Zach show Markenley how to pee on the tree. I kinda wondered how I would stop this from being a normal thing for Markenley to do. Later that night we were at Safeway and I see Markenley standing up next to a cardboard display saying 'pee pee' looking as if he is going to try to go there...EEEKKKK ..Todd grabbed him and ran to the bathroom. Sheesh....I don't know what I would have done had he gone in the middle of the aisle in Safeway. I need to learn more Creole!!

Last night Solomon refused to go to sleep. I had layed with him for like an hour. It was so hard because as much as I love that time with the boys, I was feeling extremely guilty because I wanted to be downstairs with TJ helping him with his solar system project. Oh the Mommy guilt was building up! TJ is an extremely wonderful brother but he still needs me too.
I decided just to get him up and go help TJ. Solomon was being hysterically funny. He did not seem tired at all. He played and was being goofy as we made an awesome solar system. Later when we went to bed Solomon was sleeping in between Todd and I. He would, in the dark, go over to todd and kiss him, then to me..smooch smooch smooch. Finally I turned to my side and my back was to him. He would tap me and then I would turn to look at him and he would kiss me and then push my head back down..over and over. It was adorable.
I wonder how they were put to bed in the O. Markenley wants to lay on top of todd or I. He falls asleep pretty fast, but if i try to move from the bed when he is still awake he will pull me back to him.
I have read that leaving the room after they fall asleep will only cause anxiety and they will have a hard time falling asleep the other nights. hmmm...could this be why Solomon won't fall asleep as easily, or is there just too much excitement? Or is it because he is a Dunn and the Dunn kids are all night owls?? Solomon used to let his sisters snuggle him during nap time occasionally....as of last night it is only Mommy.
I can honestly say that I feel as if Solomon has been here forever. Markenley is still learning to trust, he is doing good though. He is a funny character, he loves to laugh. We are still trying to figure out the hair...it will need to be re-done soon. A doctor and receptionist both thought he was a girl today....hmmm...what to do. Will Markenley even let me spend that much time on his hair? Everyday I make sure I rub his hair and tell him how much I love it and want to take care of him. We'll see.

love you all.

Bonding!

2008-05-19T13:49:00.000-07:00

Ok, the big kids are at school and the two little ones are napping! I have a cold so i feel yucky!
Overall things are going well. The first few days were a blur and I did a lot of worrying about the boys hearts and attachment...but each day brings us all closer. Markenley is a daddy's boy and Solomon is a mommy's boy. Yesterday at church was hard. Todd had to be play and sing during the service and Markenley wanted Daddy. First service I spent holding Markenley in Todd's office while he screamed and yelled for Daddy. After about 20 minutes he calmed down, rested in my arms and even went in the sling. I held him for a while and he was content and then was happy to see Daddy. During the second service he did the same. He does calm down and then we have a special bonding moment. Todd and I have made a concious effort to swap kiddos and he does the after bath massage with Soly and I do the same with Markenley. Putting them to bed is a special time of bonding too. Last night our family walked around the block and Soly was being pushed in his stroller and I held Markenley the whole time...he had a water bottle and each flower we passed he gave a drink of water. The closeness we shared was wonderful. Each day promotes new memories and bonding. We are constantly in awe that they are actually here. Each day also brings new challenges of teaching them...like getting little Soly to not throw his cup, not hit, or spit. He is a super sweet little boy, but when he doesn't like something he will tell you! I have seen that in the toddler room at the orphanage...the clawing and scratching of sweet little kids to get back their prized possession. We don't get upset at them because they don't know any better. These little ones have gone through far more in their little lives than we can ever imagine. We are thanking God that they are here, they are safe and they are loved. Our older kids are doing great with the boys too. They are a huge help and also very understanding of the need for them to bond with Mom and Dad. My little TJ seems so big to us and that is sad!!
Love to you all!
Renee

Ice cream and kisses!!

2008-05-17T18:50:00.000-07:00

Solomon and TJ

Taylor, Solomon and TJ...kisses and ice cream?? Wow!